Silly Seeley's Stoopid Spell
by etakkate
Summary: What if Hannah was a Hoax?  Love her? Hate her? You will enjoy it either way.  A fun and fulfilling OOC one shot tag for The Doctor in the Photograph!


**This is, by no means anxty - a little silly Seeley OOC fun! After the encouraging reviews I have recieved from Temperance Brennan's Perfect Murder, I couldn't help myself, thank you! please enjoy!**

The petite blonde was sprawled out belly down across his bed, engrossed in a book. Looking up at him standing in his bedroom doorway, concern etched into the divinely proportioned lines of her face. "Seeley, what's wrong? You look like someone just ran over your puppy!"

Booth trudged across his room – still wet from the rainstorm (and perhaps a few tears – but we will never know) "Someone almost ran over Bones tonight."

She sat up with a spring – her curls bouncing excitedly at her side, "Oh no! Is she ok?"

"Yeah, I caught her... nearly didn't though."

"Well that's good then..." she studied his crestfallen face as he fell exhaustedly onto the bed, "isn't it?"

"Yeah... yeah I suppose..."

Hannah took in his anxiety ridden features. She had come to realise that when a serious conversation hung on the topic of his partner – it was best to wait for him to talk and not to touch him.

A moment or two passed and Booth sat up and leaned forward on a loudly exhaled breath – resting his elbows on his knees, "She said... she said that she regrets that we didn't get together... you know... romantically."

"Oh." Hannah was trying to stop the smile that was stubbornly threatening to break across her face.

"Yeah."

"So, that's why you're upset. You love her Seeley; you think you missed your chance."

He made eye contact with Hannah for the first time that night – guilty, overwhelmed tears breached the rims of his bloodshot eyes. With barely a whisper, he nodded, "Yeah."

"You love her... right?"

He dropped his head to his hands, nodding, "Yeah... yeah, Hannah I do. I'm sorry, I tried to ignore it but I just can't. I'm sorry."

She smiled, leaned forward so she was a breath away from his ear and quipped with comical flair, "Can you say that a little louder for the camera, please?"

"What? Wait... what camera?" his head sprung up and eyes jumped frantically around the room – searching.

"Just kidding," Hannah laughed as she threw her hands up heavenward, "Oh thank God! FINALLY!" Bounding up from the bed she skipped to the robe and began pulling out the female section of clothing – placing it neatly into a half packed suitcase that was ready and waiting on the floor.

"What? Hannah?" her excitement did little for his ego (though his ego, most definitely needed taking down a rung or two). He felt like a squint in a room full of bullies – naked in the light of their evil taunts.

"Well, der, Seeley! It took you long enough! You know – Angela had you pegged to last not even a month without admitting you love Temperance!" she laughed dismissively, "Optimism - must be the hormones, huh?"

He was furious now – suddenly realising that he had been the butt of their joke, he stood – his arms flailing with every sentence, "What the hell! You guys planned this? You tricked me! So, what, you used me just for sex? A free place to stay in DC?"

"Huh! Don't flatter yourself, Seeley. As much as it was fun, Jack's monetary reward for getting you to see sense will be much, much more enjoyable! That guy is _loa-ded_!"

Booth's jaw hit the ground with the blatantly flirty wink that she shot him. Reeling; he flopped back down onto the bed. It took him a moment to shake the sudden itch in his trigger finger with the thought of Hodgin's paying his girlfriend out. Well, the safe assumption here was – _ex_ girlfriend.

"So, you used me?"

"Yes! But, in all fairness, Seeley – you used me too. Angela was simply worried about you two, approached be about it and we... kinda came to a little agreement. I was still trying to work out how I was going to get you to admit your feelings for Temperance and break it off with you but, well... you're a real gem, Seeley - you made it real easy for me!"

He shrugged, "Yeah... I guess..." He huffed out a deflated laugh, "I'm just that kinda guy, huh Hannah?

"Does Bones know?"

"No. You know, for all her weirdness – she has some pretty good friends."

"What do you mean _good_?"

"A million dollars good!" She squealed in delight, "Best paying job I've ever done! I'm thinking of changing professions!"

He chuckled, "Yeah – a lot of money in escorting... so I hear" he looked at her with a wink and a reserved grin.

Yes, he was upset with Hannah but, at the same time - he was simply relieved that the whole breakup went so smoothly (however weired and unethical and completely tripped out it had been) and he was free now to repair the mess that was his partnership with Brennan. It wouldn't be an overnight fix but it was worth it - whatever the effort and time it required. Bones was worth it.

With the last of her belongings in her bag, she sat down gently beside him and placed a friendly hand on his thigh.

"Point is, Seeley - who bets a million big ones on an unsure thing?"

**OK, totally OOC and it would never actually happen in the series but, well, I am sick of the depressing pooh that they are passing off for season six so a girl's gotta dream right?**** Let me know :)**


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